Two Month Updates

The 19th was my 2 months on T day. Today was another lazy day full of cleaning, naps, and obsessive comupter checking. I took some pics today after i woke up from a nap. Thought these might be fun and random. I get tired of the same old transition pics. .....





















Things I've noticed:

My leg hair is finally growing and pretty fast. yay..I finally have leg hair.

Arm pit hair is getting longer and growing a bit more on the sides.

I was getting a lot of facial hair on the side of my lip. I decided to shave for a while until i have more facial hair. Having two or three big patches just looked silly on me.

I notice that my face looks different...it's still hard to describe, fat redistribution.

I think the most interesting thing that is going on right now is my voice. It is all over the place!!! up and down and cracking in just about every conversation I have. I think I am still trying to speak at a range? higher than I can, as my vocal chords change. It's amazing to hear and listen to myself...I swear I sound different everyday.

I continue to be crabby, emotional, and lethargic on Wednesdays...the day before shot day. I imagine this would be a whole lot worse if I was injecting ever 2 weeks instead of once a week. I don't really like doing it every week, but, for me, right now, I know it's better.

I think that's it for now....back to playing with the animals and watching RENT with Trista...

Random meme thingy....

Hello My name is

Knoll

I am

activist, artsy, BDSM, bbw admirer, bear lover, bottom, boy, chubby, chubby chaser, complex, creative, cuddly, drama queen, effeminate, FTM, FTX, fat, femme-fucking, femmeboy, fetishist, freak, geek, gender bender, gender variant, genderfuck, genderqueer, glittery, indecisive, kinky, LGBTQ, mama's boy, misunderstood, nerd, none of the above, odd, omnisexual, pansexual, polyamorous, polysexual, puppy, queer, quirky, right-brained, sex positive, starfucker, submissive, survivor, sweet, tranny, trannyboy, trannyfag, trans, transfeminist, transgender, transman, transtheorist, understanding, unique

Who are you?

Bleeding...or not

I'm getting close to being on T for two months. I have been feeling strange....I can't really explain the feelings. My emotions are up and down...my body is too hot or too cold...i'm really tired or bouncing off the walls. I feel more all over the place now than I did when I first started.

I wonder if this time it has to do with the fact that I got my shot yesterday and was supposed to start my period yesterday. I've only bleed one since starting T. I've had some cramping though. I think I am done bleeding. I hope so. I was dreading it...and it feels like I am finally feeling at home in my body. I feel happy to celebrate something that I feel like was not right for my body--ending.

I used to try to not associate bleeding with a gender...like pretend to myself that this happened to my body, but not becuase I was a particular gender..or..had a certain type of body. It was just something that happened to me and only me. I feel like I lived a lot of my life that that....as knoll and as knoll as the execption to the rule.

I think some of these issues play into some of my anxieties about actaully passing....

more to come on that and a 2 moth update soon.

Much love..

Knoll

A Poem....

"I didn't start at F, I'm not ending at M.
It may be a continuum but definitions take over if you give in to em'.
Androgyny oughta be both/and not neither/nor, the vacuum natures abhors
& culture won't accomodate, & govternment forms won't allow you to approximate.
I check the box F & I feel like a liar, check M for Male and I feel like a fraud,
in a world that pretends such things are commanded by God.
Maybe someday they'll firgure out that the boxes are too small.
In the meantime the only choice is, checking them all. "

From Not Starting at F, Not Ending At M
by Skian McGuire

voice changes

I guess my voice changes are becoming more evident.

Tonight at work a youth at work after hearing my voice commented.."whoa, your voice sounds different...sounds like you dropped a nut or something"

HAHAHAHAHAH!!!

Month 1 Update

I've been taking T for 6 weeks, but am just going to make this my month 1 update. I hope to update this monthy for those overseas during my transition (Monique) and anyone who just can't get enough of my "look!!! I grew another hair" stories. I decided to start a seperate journal away from LiveJournal.

Currently I'm taking 100 mg once a week.
Things I'm noticing
-My voice is dropping a bit
-I'm hungry and horny like "Whoa"
-My dick is growing
-I'm growing a tiny bit of facial hair
-My jawline looks a bit different...fat in my face redistributing
-Mentally I feel really scattered
-Things are more visually appealing...

I'm not too sure if these last two have anything to do with the T...but it feels like they are.


Here are a few one month pictures...

First entry....

Welcome to my transition journal.

I began Testosterone 4-19-06 and will be chronicling my journey here.

Happy reading :)